What I've gathered about Fetlife is that in olden times, folks used it as a kinky Facebook. You'd be able to connect, learn, and keep up with your friends/community. The intention is that you would these people in real life. There are other kinky sites with similar ideas and like this one is specific to a certain interest. Fetlife has become rather mainstream and therefore getting more traffic. The more people you have, the wider the interests and purposes of being on the site are. There are other similar sites that have died off or banned certain things so they flock to the next best thing. Like when Craigslist got rid of their personals section. A lot of those folks who might not even be kinky are heading to Fet. Now for the nefarious folks and encounters on that site. Like anywhere on the internet, you will meet people who are empowered by the anonymity of the internet and held unaccountable for their actions/words. It takes maturity to handle how unforgivingly provocative others can be. , Just because they’re on Fetlife doesn’t mean they’re not a predator. Fetlife doesn’t protect its users from them, and doesn’t protect victims. This subreddit is for victims to share stories and name names., Any advice for using fetlife? I got fetlife the other day and all that has happened is I've had a series of horrible experiences with Doms in messages and now I want to cry. I didn't approach them, they approached me and when they told me their ages I said the gap was too big and they got angry at me Has anyone had positive experiences on this .